Yesterday marked the end of the second nine weeks grading period at the boys schools. Both came home with reports cards that made us proud. Zachary was recently awarded the title of "Star Student", and missed the "A-B" honor roll by just one "C". Dylan earned a citizenship award and made the "A-B' honor roll.
I am trying not to sound too braggartly, and I don't have a bumper sticker on the back of my mini-van touting my kids intelligence, but I am proud of them. As you might recall, both boys transitioned from public school at home to our local district following Christmas break. They have made a very smooth transition.
I'm proud of Jen, as well. She has had a lot on her plate, and while we both had to admit that we needed to make the difficult choice to switch educational gears, mid-year, it appears that they were academically pretty well prepared... and brought home the grades to prove it.
Good job, guys!
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
blogger block
Ten days without posting. . . I think that is my longest "dry spell" since I began blogging. I have never really lacked for subject matter, but "blogger block" is bound to happen sooner or later. I think one of the main causes is my continued unemployment. For those of you who are, or recently have been, in my situation, you might agree with me that it is hard to stay motivated when you are supposed to be supporting your family, but have no means of doing that. It is easy to get depressed and discouraged, and there are days when I accomplish very little, even though I should have the time to accomplish much.
It also appears that we were the only Chinese adoptive family in America that did nothing to celebrate Chinese New Year. I feel like such a slacker. It's not that we didn't think about it, it's just that there is not much of a Chinese population in our area, and we didn't really have the energy to come up with a celebration plan. . . and, we already had family plans out of town for this past weekend. Hopefully, next year. . .
It also appears that we were the only Chinese adoptive family in America that did nothing to celebrate Chinese New Year. I feel like such a slacker. It's not that we didn't think about it, it's just that there is not much of a Chinese population in our area, and we didn't really have the energy to come up with a celebration plan. . . and, we already had family plans out of town for this past weekend. Hopefully, next year. . .
Saturday, January 17, 2009
the rest of the story...
As I was wrapping up last night's post and heading to bed, I realized that the birthday story was not quite complete. I thought about how joyous it was for us to celebrate January 16th, but I was also saddened to think that half a world away is a young woman, who I will never know, for whom this day is probably not so joyous. That young woman was present the moment our daughter took her first breath. That young woman gave life to our daughter.
When I say "our daughter", perhaps you think I am referring to Jen and myself. Actually, I was not. You see, in a strange sort of way, this significant day is shared with this unknown birth mother, for whom a great debt is owed. For it was she who chose life for this little girl.
I must admit that I cannot pretend to know how how she feels. I can only speculate. But, I believe that many birth mothers do not easily make these decisions. I believe that, in a way I will never be able to understand, they make gut-wrenching decisions, believing they are making a loving and good choice for their child. If you have trouble wrapping your mind around that, remember that each child is conceived against a unique backdrop of circumstances, relationships, cultures, religions, economics, and politics; and, until you or I have walked a mile. . . or two. . . or three, in their shoes, I for one, am not qualified to judge the decision they make.
I can only assume that Lily's China Mama loved her very much. I will not go into detail, but what little bit of insight I can gain about her, through the details of Lily's "finding", causes me to believe that my assumption is correct. I believe that somewhere in China is a woman who is haunted by the little girl she held for such a brief period. I believe she often wonders, "... where is she now. . . is she loved. . . did I make the right choice?". . . and on and on the questions roll. And, I also believe that while I celebrate the day of her birth, another probably grieves for the memories that this day brings. And, knowing I am in some cosmic way connected to this woman, I found myself grieving for her and wishing she could know that her sweet girl is loved.
She is not alone. There are millions just like her. And they are not all birth mothers. Certainly there are birth fathers in many of these scenarios that grieve, as well. And it doesn't even stop there. . . there are siblings and grandparents that are affected by hard choices. And there is nothing that you or I can really do about it. . . but to love the children that are caught in the wake of these decisions.
And, so, to these unknown birth parents I say, "I know you made some very difficult choices, but I thank you for making the choice to give life to my daughter. Rest assured, she is loved."
When I say "our daughter", perhaps you think I am referring to Jen and myself. Actually, I was not. You see, in a strange sort of way, this significant day is shared with this unknown birth mother, for whom a great debt is owed. For it was she who chose life for this little girl.
I must admit that I cannot pretend to know how how she feels. I can only speculate. But, I believe that many birth mothers do not easily make these decisions. I believe that, in a way I will never be able to understand, they make gut-wrenching decisions, believing they are making a loving and good choice for their child. If you have trouble wrapping your mind around that, remember that each child is conceived against a unique backdrop of circumstances, relationships, cultures, religions, economics, and politics; and, until you or I have walked a mile. . . or two. . . or three, in their shoes, I for one, am not qualified to judge the decision they make.
I can only assume that Lily's China Mama loved her very much. I will not go into detail, but what little bit of insight I can gain about her, through the details of Lily's "finding", causes me to believe that my assumption is correct. I believe that somewhere in China is a woman who is haunted by the little girl she held for such a brief period. I believe she often wonders, "... where is she now. . . is she loved. . . did I make the right choice?". . . and on and on the questions roll. And, I also believe that while I celebrate the day of her birth, another probably grieves for the memories that this day brings. And, knowing I am in some cosmic way connected to this woman, I found myself grieving for her and wishing she could know that her sweet girl is loved.
She is not alone. There are millions just like her. And they are not all birth mothers. Certainly there are birth fathers in many of these scenarios that grieve, as well. And it doesn't even stop there. . . there are siblings and grandparents that are affected by hard choices. And there is nothing that you or I can really do about it. . . but to love the children that are caught in the wake of these decisions.
And, so, to these unknown birth parents I say, "I know you made some very difficult choices, but I thank you for making the choice to give life to my daughter. Rest assured, she is loved."
Friday, January 16, 2009
Happy Birthday Lily!
On January 16, 2005, a precious daughter was born in the Guangdong province of southern China.
On January 16, 2008, a family in America celebrated that daughter's 3rd birthday, though they had never physically met her.
On January 16, 2009, that same family in America, now larger, celebrated their daughter's 4th birthday.
On January 16, 2008, a family in America celebrated that daughter's 3rd birthday, though they had never physically met her. On January 16, 2009, that same family in America, now larger, celebrated their daughter's 4th birthday.Happy Birthday Lily! We love you very much and we are so blessed to have you as a daughter. We are so happy to celebrate this day and we want you to know that you are forever loved and cherished!
Monday, January 12, 2009
haircuts for Lily and Mama
Lily and Mama went together to get haircuts today. We have been debating what to do with her hair for 6 months. We are new at little girl's hair. It was in her eyes when she came home, but was really not long enough to cut. It has grown out a lot since then, but it is so fine and hard to manage. Every time I cut the boy's hair, she wanted me to give her a buzz cut, like the one she had in some of her referral photos.
Here is a "before" taken yesterday for church. This is a dress Jen's aunt got her for Christmas. It is a little big, but not too bad. I said she looked really international as a Chinese-American girl in a French beret made of Scottish tartan plaid!
Here she is after her "first" haircut. It is basically just a trim. The hairdresser said her hair would not do well with bangs. She was a little disappointed when she got home and realized that it's basically the same, but shorter, and that it still falls in her eyes!
These were taken just before bed, so it's a little messy... and FULL of static! Because her hair is so fine, the static caused by the cold, dry, winter air makes it VERY difficult to work with.
Saturday, January 10, 2009
"real" snow
We had our first "real" snow of the season last night and today. We have had a few snowfalls that covered the grass, but we got 10-12 inches this time. . . enough to justify running the "Snow Boss". . . twice!
A good snowfall is a funny thing. I have noticed how it actually brings neighbors together. From about November through April, we rarely see many people in the neighborhood, let alone talk to them. But, when a good snowfall hits, especially when we wake up to it on a Saturday morning, many of us get outside to clean up and we talk to each other, sometimes more than we do in the summer. We grab shovels and help each other; we lean on shovel handles and talk about the weather, speculate how much more we might get, catch up with each other's news, or swap winter driving stories. We clean the walks of elder neighbors, and those with snowblowers, that have been dormant for months, are almost competing to get to do each other's walks or driveways. Sometimes, we even clean driveways of neighbors we don't particularly like!
For my southern friends, here are some pictures to enjoy. Know that we northerners are sometimes jealous of your mild winters. But, know, too, that we sometimes revel in this stuff, and may even feel sorry for you, at times, that you don't get to experience the pristine beauty of new-fallen snow, the fun of digging out, or the thrill of white-knuckle driving!
We woke up to about 8 inches this morning, but it continued snowing into the afternoon.
A good snowfall is a funny thing. I have noticed how it actually brings neighbors together. From about November through April, we rarely see many people in the neighborhood, let alone talk to them. But, when a good snowfall hits, especially when we wake up to it on a Saturday morning, many of us get outside to clean up and we talk to each other, sometimes more than we do in the summer. We grab shovels and help each other; we lean on shovel handles and talk about the weather, speculate how much more we might get, catch up with each other's news, or swap winter driving stories. We clean the walks of elder neighbors, and those with snowblowers, that have been dormant for months, are almost competing to get to do each other's walks or driveways. Sometimes, we even clean driveways of neighbors we don't particularly like!
For my southern friends, here are some pictures to enjoy. Know that we northerners are sometimes jealous of your mild winters. But, know, too, that we sometimes revel in this stuff, and may even feel sorry for you, at times, that you don't get to experience the pristine beauty of new-fallen snow, the fun of digging out, or the thrill of white-knuckle driving!
We woke up to about 8 inches this morning, but it continued snowing into the afternoon. ...ahh, to be a kid again! Lily, the southern China girl, has toughened up to our northern winter. She was always cold in about September, but now she generally takes the cold in stride.
The "Snow Boss"
Monday, January 5, 2009
shifting gears
After much emotional wrestling, Jen and I made the decision to put Dylan and Zachary into public school following the Christmas recess. Hence, today was their "first day" of school. Education choices have been one of our biggest parental struggles, to date. In theory, we are very pro-home education. In practice, though, we have a difficult time pulling it off.
In our state, we have the option of enrolling our kids in a privately run, publicly funded charter school. Most of these are distance learning options, sometimes referred to as "public school at home." It is a compromise between public school and traditional home school. Because it is considered a public school, our boys are on track with their age peers at our local district, with the exception of a few differences between the curriculum. It is essentially like moving to a new district, except they need to transition from the casual home atmosphere to the more structured classroom atmosphere.
We initially felt that we would be able to continue teaching them at home with the addition of Lily. But, the addition of Lily AND Ben made this plan much less feasible. As much as we wanted them schooled in the home, we had to be honest with ourselves and admit that we were being stretched in too many directions and were not doing all things well. We take these decisions very seriously and do not switch education plans on a whim, but nor can we continue to pridefully ride out a plan that we determine is just not completely effective. We try to plan long term, but we have to continually assess and make course corrections, as necessary and available. Perhaps home education can be a part of our future plan... perhaps not. For now, we feel this is the best option for our family dynamics.
Dylan was home-educated for Kindergarten, but we did not like the charter school we used. He attended our local district for first grade, then we brought him back home for second and the first half of third, with a different charter program. (As I said, we've really wrestled with these decisions). He was slightly nervous, but excited about the change. He had a pretty good idea what to expect, because of his first grade experience. He is now in the middle school, though, so he has to learn a new building. He had a good first day, and was able to reconnect with many of his friends from first grade.
Zachary has been home educated since Kindergarten, so this was a brand-new experience for him. He is more social than Dylan, so he has been lonely as a homeschooler. He, too, was slightly nervous, but very excited to go to school.
Unlike Dylan, today was Zachary's first experience riding the "Yellow Screamer". There is something sad about a parent putting their kid on the bus for the first time, but Zachary was undaunted. He did not hesitate to go to the bus stop and did not want anyone accompanying him. He went out (in the cold) about ten minutes before the bus was even scheduled, and stood, rocking on his heels, rearing to go. He came home excited, reporting that he had a great first day, didn't get lost, met several kids, and even had a little girl blowing kisses at him... which he said he wasn't too excited about! (Boy, they start early these days, don't they...)
In our state, we have the option of enrolling our kids in a privately run, publicly funded charter school. Most of these are distance learning options, sometimes referred to as "public school at home." It is a compromise between public school and traditional home school. Because it is considered a public school, our boys are on track with their age peers at our local district, with the exception of a few differences between the curriculum. It is essentially like moving to a new district, except they need to transition from the casual home atmosphere to the more structured classroom atmosphere.
We initially felt that we would be able to continue teaching them at home with the addition of Lily. But, the addition of Lily AND Ben made this plan much less feasible. As much as we wanted them schooled in the home, we had to be honest with ourselves and admit that we were being stretched in too many directions and were not doing all things well. We take these decisions very seriously and do not switch education plans on a whim, but nor can we continue to pridefully ride out a plan that we determine is just not completely effective. We try to plan long term, but we have to continually assess and make course corrections, as necessary and available. Perhaps home education can be a part of our future plan... perhaps not. For now, we feel this is the best option for our family dynamics.
Dylan was home-educated for Kindergarten, but we did not like the charter school we used. He attended our local district for first grade, then we brought him back home for second and the first half of third, with a different charter program. (As I said, we've really wrestled with these decisions). He was slightly nervous, but excited about the change. He had a pretty good idea what to expect, because of his first grade experience. He is now in the middle school, though, so he has to learn a new building. He had a good first day, and was able to reconnect with many of his friends from first grade.
Zachary has been home educated since Kindergarten, so this was a brand-new experience for him. He is more social than Dylan, so he has been lonely as a homeschooler. He, too, was slightly nervous, but very excited to go to school.
Unlike Dylan, today was Zachary's first experience riding the "Yellow Screamer". There is something sad about a parent putting their kid on the bus for the first time, but Zachary was undaunted. He did not hesitate to go to the bus stop and did not want anyone accompanying him. He went out (in the cold) about ten minutes before the bus was even scheduled, and stood, rocking on his heels, rearing to go. He came home excited, reporting that he had a great first day, didn't get lost, met several kids, and even had a little girl blowing kisses at him... which he said he wasn't too excited about! (Boy, they start early these days, don't they...)job search update
Well, this post shouldn't take much space... in two months I have not yet had a face-to-face interview! A few preliminary phone interviews, but nothing more. It's tough out there, right now!
For those of you inclined to pray, however, I do have a request. I applied for two different openings, at our local university, that I feel would be a great match for me. One is as an Academic Advisor, the other in the Academic Success Center (overseeing student tutors, etc.). Both prefer a Master's Degree, but not exactly in my field... but, I feel I made a great case for myself in my cover letters/resumes. I spoke with Human Resources today, and was able to get contact information for key staff in each department, and I plan to follow up later this week, to try to increase my odds of being considered. I am told there are many applicants, especially for the advising position, (which would probably be my choice of the two). I am also told that there will be one, possibly two more advising positions posted in the coming weeks.
This is the most exciting opportunity I have found that fits the skills of a Master's Degreed Audiologist, turned (laid-off) Architectural Draftsman. I feel either of these would be a great opportunity for me, so I would covet your prayers on my behalf. My God is not daunted by difficult odds, even though I often am!
For those of you inclined to pray, however, I do have a request. I applied for two different openings, at our local university, that I feel would be a great match for me. One is as an Academic Advisor, the other in the Academic Success Center (overseeing student tutors, etc.). Both prefer a Master's Degree, but not exactly in my field... but, I feel I made a great case for myself in my cover letters/resumes. I spoke with Human Resources today, and was able to get contact information for key staff in each department, and I plan to follow up later this week, to try to increase my odds of being considered. I am told there are many applicants, especially for the advising position, (which would probably be my choice of the two). I am also told that there will be one, possibly two more advising positions posted in the coming weeks.
This is the most exciting opportunity I have found that fits the skills of a Master's Degreed Audiologist, turned (laid-off) Architectural Draftsman. I feel either of these would be a great opportunity for me, so I would covet your prayers on my behalf. My God is not daunted by difficult odds, even though I often am!
Thursday, January 1, 2009
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