Showing posts with label introversion. Show all posts
Showing posts with label introversion. Show all posts

Thursday, December 30, 2010

it wearies me

There are some social situations that weary me.  I could go so far as to call them social pet peeves.  Two, in particular, have been popping up more than usual, lately.  Granted, I'm a bit of an anomaly in these areas.  I am who I am, but I wasn't made to always fit perfectly in this current world.

The first social peeve:  Team sports.  I have no real use for team sports.  I know, I know... it's the holy grail of American society, but they really do nothing for me, particularly, of the professional variety.
(Let me just clarify, though, that if one of my kids were interested enough in a sport to convince me (and I can be convinced) to let them play, I'd be their biggest fan... even if I didn't understand the game very well; which I often don't, since I follow so little of any sports). 
Here's my deal:  It's simple... my Dad was never into team sports, so I didn't grow up having any interest in watching or playing any team sports.  That's all.  (Although, I briefly considered running track in school.)

OK.  My opinion here.  But, isn't it a bunch of spoiled millionaires playing a game that has become so high-tech and sophisticated that there is no real "sport" left?  And, everyone takes it so seriously... spending billions every year to support the system and fuel the obsession right down to youth sports.  When five year-old T-ball teams practice 2-3 evenings a week and arguments or brawls break out in the stands over an error or a bad call, isn't it safe to say we, as a society, have taken sports a little too seriously?  What about the old adage, "it's just a game"?  I know, what a cold, crass opinion, right?  But, MY blog... MY opinion!
(And, while I'm on my soapbox, let me establish a few things for the record:  Being a non-team sports person does not equal being non-athletic!  I enjoy walking, hiking, cycling, and backpacking... all of which could fall in the category of athletics/sports, and all of which require physical participation, not just watching someone else participate.  Frankly, a lot of avid sports enthusiasts are anything but athletic!)
But, the pet peeve isn't that sports exist.  It isn't even that you may have an interest, or possibly a passion, for sports.  That's fine.  The peeve is that sports are so inseparable from being an American, especially an American male, that I become an anomaly just for choosing to take no interest.  Try making social small talk if you're a non-sports American male... virtually impossible.  A classic example (that helped spark this post) is the mandatory daily morning sports meetings sales meetings at our car dealership.  I regularly sit there, with no input or interest, and listen to all the armchair athletes passionately debate what should'a could'a would'a been done in the previous days sports matches.

It wearies me.

The second social peeve:  Introverted people are not very well understood by much of the population.  It seems more attractive and accepted to be extroverted... to the point where some introverted people miserably pretend to be extroverted in some situations.

Of course, there are levels and degrees of introversion and extroversion.  I am probably extremely introverted... to the point where I frustrate my moderately introverted (with extroverted tendencies) wife.  While I'm not [quite] a total hermit, I like being home, and I like being with my family.
"The happiest moments of my life have been the few which I have passed at home in the bosom of my family"  --Thomas Jefferson
Where this becomes a social peeve is when people do not understand or accept that this is just the way the Creator of the Universe wired some of us to operate.  A classic example (that also helped spark this post) is office parties.  I despise office parties or company Christmas parties.*  I don't despise co-workers (usually), I just don't like to spend additional time away from my home and family to spend more time with the people with which I already spend the large majority of my time, probably doing a lot of social peeve #1...

I work with some nice people.  I get along (despite my lack of sports-talk) with everyone at my workplace.  Thankfully, I was spared the misery of a formal company Christmas party.  But, a few of the guys organized an after work dinner/drink social at a local restaurant last week.  I didn't want REALLY didn't want to go.  It's not all about finances, whether or not I drink, or any of that...I'm just not wired to enjoy these settings.  But, my wiring is hard for many to understand or accept.  I'm easily labelled "antisocial"... but... doesn't that kinda parallel the definition of introversion?  Hmmmm

I didn't go, but not without feeling social peer pressure (and people think peer pressure is just a teenage phenomenon!)  And, a few co-workers (probably the ones with introverted tendencies) confided that they'd really rather not go, but felt they "had to".  What?  Had to?  How old are we?  Why can't we just be who we are comfortable being and be accepted for that?  Extroversion might be the easier of the two social spectrums, but it's not necessarily better!

It wearies me.

* ... with the one exception of PLD Christmas parties.  PLD has been known to read this blog, is a past employer, a good friend, and hosts family company Christmas parties that even this introvert can appreciate and enjoy!