Margin

Two subjects of interest to me are adoption and finances. Because I am both an adoptive parent and a volunteer budget coach (www.crown.org), I want to respond to something I have heard numerous times in regards to adoption, involving both subjects. More than once, I've heard people say something like, "We'd like to do that, but we just can't afford it". I, too, initially thought that, but I know that, within reason, most of us can afford to do what is really important to us.

First, let me dispel a rumor about adoption costs. Most people think adoption is "expensive". It really is not... it's the bureaucracy that is costly. But, since you can't get through it without the bureaucracy, it can become a costly process. This is not a reason to just dismiss the possibilities, though. Very early in the process, I was also in the "we just can't afford it" camp. And, even still there are expenses yet to be covered, which stresses me out... but my daughter is priceless!

If the "we'd like to do that" part is more than just talk, there are many routes that can be considered to help with the sting of adoption expenses. First of all, there are thousands of available children in the US foster care system that are available for adoption. Most of these adoptions are state expedited and have very few bureaucratic expenses. Outside of that, there are many organizations that offer grants for adoption expenses. There are some individuals who are opposed to adoption fundraising, and I respect their opinion; but I say, as long as it's tasteful, won't someday embarrass your future son or daughter, and that's what it takes to get kids in loving homes... go for it! Adoptive parents come up with some very creative and fun ideas to help get their kiddos home.

Lastly, I want to pull in my budgeting background. I may be stepping on some toes here, but I'll try to tread lightly! I believe many families cannot afford to adopt because they live a lifestyle that pushes them to the financial edge. America is a very debt-driven country. (We are feeling a lot of the effects of that with the recent economic fractures.) So many Americans are frantically working like a hamster on a wheel to fund a mortgaged, leased, and loaned lifestyle, without any sense of margin. Margin is what can allow the wiggle room for a financial course correction to fund such things as adoption. It is a sense of living BELOW your means-- a concept foreign to many. I firmly believe that if more families lived a more "old fashioned" financial lifestyle... more savings to pay for things up front, less debt, and more contentment with a modest lifestyle... that more families would have the margin to be able to adopt if the desire is there. Just my opinion...